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    "You can't go anywhere like that." A good rule of thumb: If it's been a year with no progress, it may be time to call it quits..All marriages have problems: He gives you the silent treatment instead of talking when he's upset; you pay more attention to the kids' school art projects than to the details of his day; neither of you can agree on the fate of Peggy after leaving Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce on Mad Men.This, you tell yourself, is just what happens after so many years together, right? Because, sure, you're not fighting, and nobody's having an affair. "If you're no longer spending any time together, if one or both of you is spending all your time at work, with friends, online—and if feels like a relief not to be with each other—it's a sign that you've already disengaged from the marriage."Some marriages encounter damaging, seemingly insurmountable problems—such as infidelity, the loss of a close family member, or a long sexual drought—and rebound from them.But, says Alisa Bowman, author of , if one spouse repeatedly brings up an issue, asks for help, and makes it clear that the marriage will not last unless they both commit to solving it, and the other spouse refuses to go along, the marriage is in trouble.

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